Saved By A Giant

I've been trying to avoid writing this particular post, but after this week in football it's unavoidable and well-deserved...and since he was drafted by the Giants in 2009, I'm a little more okay with doing this.

To: ItsMyNicksInABox@gmail.com
From: OCWordSlinger
Subject: Diamond in the Rough


Dear Hakeem,
There have been very few bright spots to look to this season in football. All the teams and players that I thought would be doing amazing have been falling short of expectations or a bit lackluster. You, however, have been the saving grace of my Fantasy Team and I thought it would only be fair to write my first Fan Email of the season to you.


This past week I was down about 18 points going into Monday's game and you were the last player to get on the field for me. It was a pretty important game to me because I was playing against Victor who had the same record as I did (3-3-0), so I needed a win to have any kind of hope of getting to the playoffs and it all relied on you. Victor has also had MONSTER games, where a lot of his players put up double-digit numbers, so I was nervous. Did you buckle under pressure or decide to take a vacation day?? 9 receptions, 112 yards, and 2 touchdowns tells me, "Nope!"


Anyways, thanks for being my awesome player this week! I know this is long overdue since you also saved me in more than a couple games so far this season, but you're a New York Giant and as a Tom Brady fan it's hard for me to be thankful for a Giant. I've tried to delay it as much as possible, but you've been really stellar when it matters. Keep up the great work!

Toilet paper isn't the only thing lacking in there...

Maybe I'm old school when it comes to bathroom etiquette, but people really need to learn proper manners for a public bathroom. There are some things that are obvious: replacing toilet paper or notifying the next girl coming in if toilet paper is out, avoid drenching the counter with excess water while washing your hands, courtesy flushes, etc. Others aren't so obvious, but this one should be:

If you're already on the pot and your phone rings, DON'T ANSWER.

Last week, I went to use the restroom which is shared by other tenants in our building. After I did my business, I went to go wash my hands. While I was singing the ABCs in my head (because that IS how long you should be soaping your hands), I heard a cell phone start to ring from one of the occupied stalls. I fully expected it to keep ringing so you can imagine my surprise when SHE PICKED UP THE PHONE AND ANSWERED, "HELLO?" EWW. There are several things wrong with that situation since I'm a germ-a-phobe, but isn't there some kind of rule or commandment where you are not supposed to answer the phone while you're sitting on the pot? I guess it would be okay in the privacy of your own home (I don't do it because it's just too weird for me), but in the public restroom of an office building? She even picked up the phone mid-stream. I know she was sitting there literally butt-naked talking on the phone about her plans for the night.  It obviously wasn't anything urgent. She could have simply finished what she was doing, wiped, washed her hands, and called the person back. FUCKING EW.

This one is a little bit different, but still has to do with cell phone/bathroom etiquette. This morning, I was in the restroom again. Just as I was finishing, one of my coworkers comes in while she was ON THE PHONE already. She gets in her stall, sits, and starts peeing all while advising her friend on the phone about what she should do about some lame ass she went out on a date with this past weekend. OMG people...is it that serious that you need to talk to people while relieving yourself?! FUCKING EW. I flushed the toilet with the hopes of it being overheard by the person she was talking to and maybe that person would have enough decency to ask my coworker to call her back. My coworker actually stopped talking and started again once the flush was done. So I guess whoever she was talking to was okay with the whole thing.

I know people use their phone to have reading material or play games while in the bathroom. For some reason, that's more okay in my head than actually having a conversation while you're peeing. But, to pick up the phone while in the act of using the bathroom or continue your conversation while using the bathroom is dirrty, dirrty , dirrty! Being drunk and doing the above is more excusable because your judgment is impaired and people might be calling to look for your drunk ass, but my coworker and the other lady have no excuse.  I'm going to say it one more time so you know how truly grossed out I am by people carrying on  phone conversations while sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom...FUCKING EW!

News Flash: T.J. gets Michelle on water rides...multiple times!

I took a day off the other week to spend some time with T.J. (my brother). Since I didn’t get him an actual birthday present and he isn’t working yet, I thought it would be fun for us to head to Knott’s Berry Farm for the day. I invited my mom and Albert to join us, but they were both swamped at work so, it was just the two of us and it worked out great in the end. T.J. and I have loved riding roller coasters together since he was finally tall enough to ride them. Knott’s was the perfect place for us to spend the day because they have pretty decent coasters, it’s not a long drive, and the tickets are pretty cheap ($30 a pop). I was really looking forward to getting on some coasters and yelling until my voice was gone. I was especially looking forward to riding Supreme Scream.

We got to the park a couple minutes after it had opened and the first ride we got on is Silver Bullet – it’s probably one of the premier coasters at Knott’s. I was a little apprehensive about taking T.J. on such a “daring” coaster for the first ride, but he handled it like a champ and I think it set a good energy for him to keep riding throughout the day.  After a couple more rides we decided to grab lunch. As we sat and ate our lunch, I pulled out the map of the park and showed him what our last ride was going to be…Supreme Scream. I was so excited about it and thought he would be too, but I think I did too good of a job describing the drop/free fall that he stopped me and said, “No, I’m too tired.” That should have been my first sign, but I didn’t think anything of it and said we’ll go on more rides before Supreme Scream. Well, we went on every coaster in the park (except for Accelerator because it was closed)…twice. We found ourselves in front of the entrance to Supreme Scream and I figured now was a better time than any to ride it. I told T.J. to follow me as I practically ran to get in line (yes, I was running, that was how much I wanted to ride this thing. I reached back to grab T.J.’s hand so we can be in line together and that’s when I noticed he was about 15 steps away from me. He wouldn’t budge and just kept shaking his head. Turns out, my brother doesn’t like rides with really high free falls, which is one of my favorites (of course). After spending 15 minutes trying to convince him to get on the ride with me, he won. I figured it’s his day, so I should do whatever he wants to do. 

Do you want to know what T.J.’s favorite ride is? Water rides…icky, wet, bacteria-ridden water rides. Do you know that you can contract Legionnaires’ Disease from inhaling particles of the bacteria that originate from infected WATER sources?? ICK. Yeah, I realize this is my mysophobia getting the best of me, but that’s really all I think of when it comes to water rides. And, I’m sure Knott’s does a great job of making sure the water is clean, but still. Regardless of my little quirk with water rides, I am happy to say I rode the Log Ride 3 times and Perilous Plunge twice, all thanks to my brother…who doesn’t seem to care about the potential bacteria on those rides (I even tried to explain it to him, but I think he stopped listening to me). T.J. was happy, so I was happy…soaked in water ride water (makes me shudder thinking about it).

The day ended with him passing out on the ride back to Corona. I may have been covered in sweat, dirty water, and who knows what else, but it was worth it to spend some quality time with T.J. (aka “Butthead”).

On a side note, I highly recommend ditching work to go to an amusement park. Spending the day outside while everyone else is in an office…eating funnel cake at 3pm instead of heading to the office kitchen to search for a little pick-me-up….screaming your head off on roller coasters instead of catering to customers all day long…it felt more liberating that I thought it would be. Plus, the longest we had to wait in line for a ride was 10 minutes. I don’t know if it’s because of the recession or because Halloween Haunt was opening the following week, but it was perfect timing and we definitely got our money’s worth.

I heart football...

Football is finally back in session! We're about to enter Week 4 of the regular season and Tom Brady is 2-1, while the Niners are 0-3. It's off to a bit of a rocky start for me being a Brady fan and a Niner fan, but it's still early in the season. If the 2007 Patriots taught me anything, winning in the post-season is what matters the most.

The beginning of football season also means the start of Fantasy Football. I'm in 2 leagues this year, but one has money involved, so that's the one I'm paying really close attention to and I'm currently ranked 2nd in that league (yay!). The other league is just for fun with Albert's cousins. I'm ranked 9th in that league (boo!), but it's okay since Tom Brady was snatched from me (double boo!) - No Brady, No Point. I'm still playing actively, but it's just so that I don't finish last. I'll be starting Fan Emails to my best players from my Fantasy teams in the next week or so...and I promise they won't all be to Mr. Brady.

Speaking of which, the above-mentioned Quarterback has been in the league for 11 years so his retirement is something I have to consider. Not now, of course, but eventually. After watching HBO's Hard Knocks and being somewhat familiar with his college career, I'm considering Mark Sanchez as my replacement for Tom Brady when Brady retires. Sanchez went to USC (a school I've always wanted to go to despite the alleged corruption that goes on), he's from Orange County, and, if you've watched Hard Knocks, he's a funny guy. I don't think he's as hot as Tom Brady, but he's only 24 so maybe he'll get hotter with age. Thanks to Wikipedia, I also know that Sanchez is a Scorpio...I almost always get along with any Scorpio I meet! It's almost a match made in heaven....almost. Well, at least I have my eyes on him, so I can try to establish that I have dibs on him in the future. LOL!

Anyways, I'm just super excited the season is here and in full swing! There's something about watching football and the fall weather (once it actually gets here) that is irresistible to me! Hoping to watch the Niners when they come down to face the Chargers, but we'll see...YAY FOOTBALL!

So Bad, But SO good.

One Friday afternoon, while winding down after a busy work week I stumbled upon a crazy little show on TLC called Four Weddings.

The show is a competition between 4 soon-to-be brides. The prize is an exotic honeymoon vacation for the couple that wins the competition. Each bride is scored by the other three brides based on food, venue, dress, originality, and overall experience. If you're thinking there's no point to this show because each bride is going to think her wedding was the best and sabotage her scores for the other brides' weddings, then you're partially right. The winning score for the episode I watched was 69%...that's an "F", if I remember correctly. And, the stereotypical brides are always contenders: over-the-top bride, drunk/ghetto bride, trying-too-hard-to-be-different bride, low-budget bride, etc. But, there is a point to the show and it's what pretty much reeled me in...

Personal touches always makes the difference. The winner in the episode was the one that had the best overall experience and originality. For example, instead of having a regular guest book, the couple made a wooden sign post and painted the cities of where their guests were coming from. Guests were then invited to leave a message on their sign and that was going to be something the bride and group would use as decor at their own house. The most common factor among the losers was that it was too "cookie-cutter".

Moral of the story: each couple has its own personality and that should show at the wedding...because it'll win you a honeymoon on a private island in Tahiti...hahah! That last part is if you're on Four Weddings, of course. It wasn't until I saw that show that I realized how important it is to know your "couple personality" when it comes to wedding planning. In retrospect, all the best weddings I've been to have been for couples that truly wanted to celebrate who they were as a couple and successfully combined their individual personalities.